Last week we featured the first part of an interview with Pat Durham, image coach. This week we finish.
"For 13 years, Pat has been assisting her clients develop to their fullest potential. As an image coach, Pat deals in all areas of personal appearance, voice, developing the content and delivery of presentations and instruction in business and social etiquette." I want to thank Pat again for her graciousness in giving this interview. Don't forget to bookmark her site [Diversity Unlimited]
Enjoy!
Speaking of what you're selling, what do you think about authors looking like their genre? For example, a suspense author, looking suspenseful? Or a romance author looking very feminine?
I believe that people who write mysteries have a deep sense of drama within themselves. If they did not, I do not believe they could write their genre convincingly. So there's nothing wrong with adding a bit of drama to what they are wearing. And for the person who is writing for the feminine market, I believe that a little bit of lace, perhaps something that looks antique, makes a wonderful soft touch. We shouldn't pass up the opportunity.
If someone hired you as a personal shopper, what would that consist of?
I recommend that we start by analyzing their color. Let's make sure they are in the right color family. Then we'd look at their fashion personality. Maybe because of their mom, older sister, etc., they've been dressing in a style that is not them. Maybe someone has told the person how to dress and they look like they're wearing somebody else's clothing. We'd also do a figure analysis. Perhaps they are wearing clothing that doesn't present them in the best possible way.
Once we've corrected those things, we are well on our way. Then I would suggest they come in and we do a makeover. I show them the proper way to care for their skin, the best way to apply their daytime makeup, and I'll give tips as to what the camera likes and what it does not.
After that, I take them to a master hairstylist. They will be looking in the mirror while the hairstylist and I are talking about what I see. I'll tell the stylist what I think will compliment the person, and she'll tell me whether it will work with their hair type. Sometimes I think their hair should do something that I find out can't be done. My client has a choice at that point in time. They can go back to their hairstylist and say "this is what I want to have done," or they can work with the hairstylist I have taken them to.
Then, I would suggest they go through their closest and take out everything they haven't worn in the last year. Either give those items a new home or give them a decent burial. One of the two. Get rid of it. You're not using it. Don't keep it in your closet. You think you have clothing but you don’t. If it doesn't fit, for heaven sake get rid of it. Once you have your wardrobe pared down, I will tell you how you should put it in your closet so you can get dressed in the best time. (Now having said that, if you've got a system that works for you, by all means do that.)
It's a lot cheaper for them to do this step on their own. I charge an hourly fee and I charge a lot. This saves them money. Then I can come in and look through their closet and tell them, "I know you like this but this is not a good choice for you," or "Be sure to keep this."
Usually one of the things I suggest is buy a good quality, tailored blazer—that will cover a multitude of sins.
What mistakes do you most commonly see with hair and makeup?
The most common mistake is that people are using the wrong color on their hair—a color that is not complimentary to their skin tone and therefore washes them out. That I would say is the number one mistake. The number two mistake is not having the best hairstyle for the shape of their face. I see that over and over again.
Give an example of what hairstyles match different faces.
The face has three different sections to it, if you're looking at it as an artist looks at it. You want it to be balanced.
So if you have a very prominent forehead you would be sure to want the hair to come down onto the forehead, in a wispy sort of way. That breaks up that long line taking place between the eyebrow and the hairline. Now if you have a very short area between the eyebrow and the hairline, then you would want to take the hair away from the face and pull the eye upwards.
A person who has a round face would not want to have a round hairdo. They would want a hairdo that softens the roundness of their face—something that is complimentary as opposed to recreating the same form all over again.
You have the same problem if you were decorating a living room. If you have a room filled with round things, you need to compliment it with square, rectangular, perhaps even triangular objects. It's the same thing with a face. I am in my sixties, and when a person hits my age, usually long hair is not a good option. We need to think about how we can visually pull the face upwards. It's an optical illusion, that's what all this is—dressing, the hair, and the makeup. An optical illusion.
Tell me about coaching someone through a television interview.
First of all they have to start with knowing their subject. They must know their subject inside and out. I also encourage them to know their interviewer. What is the age of this person? What is the gender? Where is this person coming from—in other words, is this a Midwest prospective? East coast? Is it from Texas, as we're a whole nation unto ourselves? Prepare. Prepare. Prepare.
Then when the interview comes you will feel as comfortable as possible.. Let's face it, it's always a little unnerving.
Also, the way you sit is extremely important. Our mother's and aunties were right. Sit up straight, and for heaven sakes, if you're a woman, don't cross your legs. If you're going to wear a skirt, make sure it covers. That is so distracting. Your audience will not be able to concentrate on what you are telling them, because they're looking at other areas of your body.
If it's a live presentation, there is a way I teach you to approach the camera.
Let's talk radio interviews. Your services help people with their inflection and tone of voice. Some people grow tense waiting for the interview to start. What tips do you give clients to help?
One of the things that I do myself, and I recommend this for everyone, is that I have this little diction ditty that I go through. What it does is helps me to focus. It also helps me with my diction, my inflection, my breath control. I have other diction exercises like: yellow lilies, yellow lilies, yellow lilies, and just say that over and over. If you concentrate on those type of things, it helps to keep your mind off of what is about to take place.
So you advise not focusing on the interview itself?
I do because you've already done your preparation. Sometimes it's good to relax. It's all there. You know you've got it. Now you need to get your thoughts focused. It's being able to center yourself.
Just remember you're the expert. You have to remember who you are. You're it. The person must have thought you were worth having at an interview or they wouldn't have asked you. They're going to ask you questions, and you just need to answer them as truthfully as you can.
I believe we have to prepare, we have to dress up, we have to show up, and we have to smile. After that, it's really out of our hands. There are just some things we cannot control.
How do you prepare someone for the big one-- public speaking?
Yes, this is the big one.
Well first, you must be in character before you arrive. I tell people this all the time. When I'm on my way to a presentation, I am getting in character. When that door opens, I am not Grandmamma, not mom, not wife, and I'm not sister. I am Pat Durham, image coach. That's who I am. And I walk in with that confidence. I am the person that they have asked to come and are paying handsomely to speak.
You arrive in character. You don't wait until you walk through the door because then it's too late. You've already lost it, because who knows who you will meet in the parking lot. They are part of your audience.
I try to connect with every person I can. I want to garner as many friends as possible before I go up on stage. I think that's the most wonderful thing you can do for yourself—and for them, because that makes them very open and waiting for what you have to say. They may have said to someone else, "Oh I met her out in the parking lot and she's just going to be dynamite. I can't wait to hear her speech."
And then, the first thing you must do is engage your audience. You want to connect and engage them. If you find your fears are getting away from you, then I suggest you look somewhere else, the very back of the room. I know some people pretend that their audience is naked, if that works for you, go ahead. (Laughing) But to me, that's very distracting.
You cannot just walk in and be a bump on the log. You have got to network.
If someone wants to hire you, do they fly in? Do you have workshops?
I do have workshops and they post on my website. The most cost effective way would be to look at upcoming workshops, what their focus is going to be about, and then deciding what would best suit them. That's one way.
It's best to have a one-on-one. That is absolutely the ultimate. For someone out of state, this can be a challenge but they can fly in and work with me. I can come to them, but of course, they would be paying for my travel and lodging expenses.
It is a working progress. It's not going to happen over night. It's not a one-hour shot. I do have a lot of clients who are working to move to the next level. That's the whole deal. They want to move to the next level, and they know they are not equipped to get there, but they're so close they can taste it.
The minute someone says "Will you work with me?" I go into overdrive. It's just ridiculous. I can't shut it off. This is the most exciting thing to do. Nothing could be more rewarding. It's just like painting a beautiful painting. They're just these wonderful works of art in progress and I get to help put some of those splashes of paint on the canvas. It's just wonderful.
One tradition Barbour Publishing started in 2003 is to award a contract at the conference to a first time author for their debut novel. This year, the recipient was Cara Putman.
