Counting The Costs of a Writer's Life

by Rachel Hauck

Merry Christmas, Happy New Year!

We spend a lot of time at Novel Rocket, My Book Therapy, and in the writing industry as a whole talking about craft, networking, marketing, promoting, and the general way to write a book. Panster, plotter, planster (plotter and panster combination.)

But what we don’t discuss much is the cost of giving your life to writing. Especially to writing fiction.

There’s a price tag, and while I love what I do, there are days I “feel” the price I’ve paid.

I have no co-workers. I sit in my lovely tower, which I adore, alone every single day. Sometimes the phone never rings for me. I may not get a personal email or friendly phone call for days.

My family lives out of my state. I don’t have children. My life is carved out perfectly to crank out two, maybe three books a year. But I gotta tell ya, it can get lonely.

I’m so grateful for the friends the Lord has given me. Susie Warren, Beth Vogt, Lisa Jordan and others.

I can’t write a book without calling Susie several times a week. Nearer to my deadline, I might call her several times a day. I value her friendship and input! What a gift.

But practically speaking, she lives in Minnesota. I live in Florida.

One of my favorite things from days-gone-by was my corporate job relationships. We had some sure laughs and some grand lunches, and great success on the job. I loved solving a problem and celebrating with my co-workers. The day-job provided immediate feedback.

Sure, there were the tough days, the drag-my-butt-into-the-office days. And I had a very interesting boss. But overall, I enjoyed my office job.

I read about writing being a solitary life. I’m good with solitary. But friends, it is a really solitary life.

Writers have to say, “No,” to extracurricular activities. We can’t be running around town shopping, or lunching, or sadly, volunteering.

We have to shut off the TV, the radio, the internet and just “be” with our stories and characters. We must face the pain of making people that only live in our heads and hearts come to life on the page.

Good writing days are followed by hard writing days. We wrestle with our insecurities and doubt. There might be days or weeks where we hear from no one in our profession: not a reader, an editor or agent.

The only way we go forward with any confidence is by sheer discipline and will. And it’s a fight!

The other day I was driving to morning prayer at church, wrestling with my lack of close, local friendships. No don’t go feeling sorry for me, I do have friends. I do! I’m not a hermit or miser. But, the friendships I used to have at work, or when in college, are gone. At my age, many of my friends are busy with children or even grandchildren!

As I mused over this, I finally thought, “Maybe it’s not that I lack friends but I lack the right perspective.”

I’ve chosen the writer life and with it comes certain handicaps. It’s not 9-5. I’m not surrounded by people all day. To do the job, I have to retreat sometimes.

The challenge for us is to be content exactly where God has us. As I mused over my situation, I heard Jesus say, “I’m your friend.”

I teared up. “Will you come to my house for Christmas dinner?”

“I will.”

See, it’s about perspective. What a true and dear friend we have in Jesus. And the friends I do have in my town, are lovely and always ready for a lunch when I can break free!

But, back to the writer’s life. Are you ready to pay the cost? I’m not the only writer who struggles with friendship time and heart-connections within the local community.

I’ve heard other writers share similar things. It’s why we’ve created the My Book Therapy Community. It’s why there are writing organizations like American Christian Fiction Writers.

Take stock of yourself. Are you too busy being a friend and doing other things to write? Even for writing moms, at some point, you have to close out the hubbub and noise of the family and write. I’m awed by my mom writing friends like Susan Warren, Cara Putman, Kristin Billerbeck and Tracey Bateman.

Are there things in your life cluttering out writing?

Count. The. Cost.

The life of a novelist will cost you precious things. But it is worth it. So very worth it.

Tips

1. Get with the Lord. Spend time with Him, praying over your schedule, asking Him to release your heart as an author.
2. Counsel with your spouse or close friends, parents or other family. Is this the time to devote to writing and say no to other things? Or will that season come later. It is RIGHT and PERFECT to wait until the “write” season.
3. Find a place that’s yours to write. Make sure no one else invades. It’s yours. Even if it’s a table at Panera or Starbucks, make it your writing spot.
4. Schedule time to be with friends and family. Be purposeful. If you do ministry at your church or volunteer in the community, keep to a schedule. Don’t pick up extra jobs just because you feel bad for someone. Do ONLY what the Lord has called YOU to do.
5. Write on the hard days. Sometimes those words are better than the ones who come on the good days. If you only have an hour to write on busy days, take it!

Writing is purposeful. So is the writer’s life. Be purposeful. Tune out the noise. Still your heart and mind.

Write, counting the cost.

TWEETABLES

Counting The Costs of a Writer's Life by Rachel Hauck (Click to Tweet)

While I love what I do, there are days I “feel” the price I’ve paid.~ Rachel Hauck (Click to Tweet)

Writing is purposeful. So is the writer’s life.~ Rachel Hauck (Click to Tweet)

New York Times, USA Today ​and Wall Street Journal best-selling, award-winning author Rachel Hauck loves a great story. She serves on the Executive Board for American Christian Fiction Writers. She is a past ACFW mentor of the year.  A worship leader and Buckeye football fan, Rachel lives in Florida with her husband and ornery cat, Hepzibah. Read more about Rachel at www.rachelhauck.com.

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A Tribute to a Great Writing Friend

Dan Walsh is the bestselling author of 15 novels, including The Unfinished Gift, The Discovery and When Night Comes. He has won 3 Carol Awards and 3 Selah Awards. Three of his books were finalists for Inspirational Book of the Year (RT Book Reviews). Dan is a member of ACFW and Word Weavers. He lives with his wife, Cindi, in the Daytona Beach area where they love to take walks and spend time with their grandkids. Click here to connect with Dan or check out his books.

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Last week I lost a very good friend. The day he passed and for the next week, my grief was profound. I'm still not over it. He wasn't a writer, but he was certainly a great source of encouragement in my writing. 

I'm referring to my dog, Darcy. Darcy was a mini-Australian shepherd. Along with his sister,

Bailey, they've been keeping me company every day as I write for the last several years (Darcy is the gray one on the right). For those of you who write full-time, you know it can be a lonely vigil. But Darcy wouldn't let that happen. He had a way of constantly inserting himself into my day with mostly welcomed and pleasant interruptions. He wasn't a high-maintenance dog; he just loved to be with me and wouldn't put up with me ignoring him for too long. 

He started getting sick midway through the summer, with a persistent cough and frequently running out of breath. He was only eight years old, so we knew it wasn't his age. We took him to the vet, who diagnosed him with congestive heart failure. We were really alarmed but were told it was something that could be controlled with medication, and that he still had a good many years ahead of him. 

That wasn't what happened. 

For the next 6 weeks, he grew increasingly worse, and the vet kept increasing his meds. It was so hard to see him suffer and not be able to do anything to really help him. He would constantly come to me for comfort when he got afraid, as if somehow I could make his suffering go away. I took the picture here on the right during one of those times. For some reason, my efforts to love and comfort him did seem to help temporarily. His face would brighten right up, and his little doggy smile would return.

But eventually, even my comfort didn't help. It became obvious he wasn't going to make it. So one night last week, after holding him for 6 hours then saying our final goodbyes, I brought Darcy down to an emergency vet clinic at around 3am.

To be honest, the amount of grief my wife and I have experienced since letting him go is very similar to the grief we've felt when losing close family members. I know some people couldn't possibly understand this. Dogs are pets, not people. Usually these people are not "dog people" and don't really understand the unique relationship dog owners can have with their pets. At the same time, we've received dozens of comforting notes from other dog lovers who totally get it. They speak about the grief they've gone through, and it's remarkably the same.

It's like losing a close member family, because that's exactly who Darcy was. And I realized, for me, he was even a little more than that. 

Let me explain.

I've just finished the first novel in a new series, called Rescuing Finley. Finley, as you might have guessed, is a dog. Each of the novels in the series will feature a dog as a main character. Finley is a shelter dog who winds up rescuing the two people who think they are rescuing him. One is a former meth addict who becomes a female inmate who helps train Finley to become a service dog. The other is a Marine who lost his leg to a landmine in Afghanistan, and he's really struggling with PTSD.

To research this book, I spent all kinds of time reading and watching videos about veterans who said, time after time, that their service dog literally saved their lives. This is no exaggeration. The stats say 22 war veterans are committing suicide every day because of PTSD issues. Yet somehow, many of them are being saved through the power of a relationship they are having with these dogs.

These vets talk about their dogs with the same passion they talk about their combat buddies. Usually after a few sentences, they choke up and start crying. As a researched their stories, I realized I completely understood what they mean.

Five years ago, I went through a terrible relational and financial trial that devastated me emotionally. It got so bad, I saw a doctor who said I was having the same kind of PTSD symptoms soldiers have (although clearly, they've suffered far worse than I). Nevertheless, I now realize just how much Darcy helped me through this time.

He wasn't a trained service dog, but he served the same role in my life. For those of you who aren't dog lovers, perhaps if I explain it this way it will help. Imagine you have a close friend who loves you unconditionally. He never judges you or makes you feel tense. Just the opposite. You feel totally accepted and loved whenever he is near. If you're hurting, he's right there to help in any way he can. He is completely devoted to your welfare and, without hesitation, will always puts your needs ahead of his own. He loves spending time with you, even wasting time with you. In fact, he'll drop whatever he's doing if there's even a chance to be with you doing anything at all. This relationship goes on this way for years, and these qualities about your friend never diminish. If anything, they only grow in their intensity. 

Now imagine, this incredibly good friend suddenly dies. That's how it feels. 

That's why the grief is similar to losing a close loved one or friend. Because that's who Darcy was to me (to us...my wife's grief equaled my own). One of the things that has really helped, besides the great comfort offered by other dog-loving friends, is to know that my God perfectly understands everything I've just said, and everything were going through. He created these wonderful little creatures and appointed them to be some of our best friends.

I only wish he would have given them the lifespan of a tortoise. I'm sure tortoises are very nice in their own way. But really, why give them 75 years?

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