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Sunday, July 17, 2005

You'll Never Be Good Enough

"You'll never be good enough." We all tell ourselves that, don't we? Or is it just those of us with the melancholy personality? (If you don't have a clue what I'm talking about, check out Tim LaHaye's, Why You Act the Way You Do. )

I'll never be a good enough Christian, wife, mother, friend or writer.
Truth is, no matter how hard I try, I'll never be perfect. Not at anything.
I should strive to be the best I can. We all should. But, I'm trying to come to terms with my humanity. My imperfections.

I'm a pretty good writer. Some might say very good. Some might say terrible, I don't know. But, I think I do okay. Heck, since I'm practicing taking off my mask, sometimes I think my writing rocks. Shhh, don't tell.

Then I read something like Francine River's, Redeeming Love or Randy Alcorn's, Safely Home or Frank Peretti's, Monster and realize, I'm a hack. These people, and others, are so unbeleivably talented, so why should I bother?

I bother because we all can't be Francine Rivers. I don't even write in the same genre. She was meant to write her stories for hurting women.
And I was meant to write mine. It's hard, maybe impossible to judge our own abilities and talents.

I recently had an extrodinarily talented author friend tell me I was the most talented writer he knew. I mumbled a thank you and convinced myself he was blowing smoke.

I recently told one of my critique partners that he was one of the most naturally talented I knew. He mumbled a "thank you" and changed the subject.

We can't know if what we're writing is a masterpiece or drivel. The world will judge for themselves. And we know how that goes.

I've read books that I've literally hugged when I finished, they were so good. Sick, aren't I? Then I go on Amazon to give a glowing review and see someone else has tore the work to shreds.

One man's literature is another man's cage liner, I guess.
I'll just work as hard as I'm able and if it gets praised, great. If it gets pooped on by some bird or hamster, well, at least it was useful to someone.

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