WHY DID I QUIT MY DAY JOB?
Lately I have been struggling with a
crisis about my calling to write. My pre-published friends wonder why I
complain. I am where they hope to be: writing full time, with close to thirty
published titles under my belt, and more books under contract. I am blessed. I
know that.
But doubts creep in when day after day
I struggle to write. My health is fair-to-poor, and the days I don’t feel 100%
far outnumber the times I feel well. I want to write more and instead have to
write less. Getting words on paper challenges me all the time, and it’s even
harder when my body seizes with pain or allergies clog my head.
So I found myself asking: am I truly
called to write? I know I can write.
I even know people enjoy my books. But have I made a difference? And if I
haven’t, why do I put myself through the hard work (some days it feels like
torture) of producing a quality book?
Recently I wrote the 100th
post on my new blog, http://mydailynibble.blogspot.com/.
I reread many of my posts, and surprised myself to discover
I had written about God’s call to write—encouragement taken from the Bible,
Genesis through 2 Kings. Some of the lessons I had learned:
· Write
all the words, sharply (Deuteronomy 27). What differentiates a writer from one
who wants to? A writer writes. Period.
Write from the heart, and hone my craft.
· My
voice is unique (Numbers 18). No one else can tell my stories the way I will.
It is an exclusive calling; if I don’t write them—no one can and no one will.
· Treat
God as holy by writing about Him and presenting Him artistically (Leviticus
21-22.) In my writing, I present holy (not perfect) people doing holy things—in
real life settings.
· Exodus
37-38 provided a lot of lessons, including:
· The
God who gifted to write romantic fiction may also lead me to write a different
genre, even nonfiction.
· I’m
not a household name, but one of a group of largely unknown authors who write
Christian fiction.
· In
My Daily Nibble, I seek the break down the law (both the Torah and all of God’s
Word) in bite-sized nuggets of understanding.
· God
doesn’t call me to be anyone other than myself. My writing can’t and shouldn’t
copy someone else’s style.
· Writing
is often an act of faith.
· Whatever
God wants me to write, He won’t give up on me or leave me, but He will see me
through to the finish. (Joshua 2)
· Writing
may/will move me out of my comfort zone. (Genesis 31-32)
At the same time, I spoke with a
supportive friend. She pointed out the obvious: “Maybe you are under attack.
Maybe God has something even bigger that you are or will be working on, and
Satan is trying to stop you.”
Oh. Suddenly it made sense to me,
especially in light of all the things God had shown me in His word.
If I needed any additional “signs,” God
gave me a three-book contract—while I was in the hospital for a week.
So I am once again doing the hard job
of writing and asking God for daily strength.
Many writers—so close to 99% I would
almost dare to say all of us—fight
self-doubt and discouragement. Visit the milestones when the call seemed the
most clear. Remind yourself why you started writing—why you should continue.
One final thought: The last time
(before now) that I seriously considered quitting was ten years ago. At the
time, I had no books published although I had been writing for over ten years.
I asked God, am I foolish to pursue this pipe dream?
The answer I got was—I don’t have to
know if God wants to write five years from now. I only need to know if He wants
me to write today, on this particular project.
Don’t worry about the rest of your
life. Ask God for wisdom for today.
Mary Anne is on the run.
Her father's been murdered, and now the mob's
after her, too. Leaving New York City behind is the only way to stay alive. Yet
Mary Anne Lamont finds herself stuck in Maple Notch, Vermont, when her car
crashes straight into Wallace Tuttle's truck. Wallace and his family offer her
warmth and welcome, no questions asked. But she doesn't dare give them her real
name—not without risking their safety too.
At first, Wallace chides himself for being
distracted by the glamorous flapper. Mary Anne certainly doesn't fit his image
of a future wife. But underneath the bleached bob and big-city ways is a
courageous, caring woman. When the danger she's been running from draws close,
Wallace must risk everything to prove his faith in Mary Anne, in God's plan,
and the dreams they've come to share.
Excellent post. Thanks for writing what most of us feel from time to time.
ReplyDeleteHi, Gina, thanks for the encouragement.
DeleteKEEP UP THE GOOD WORK DARLENE. I'M ONLY JUST CONTRACTED AFTER TEN YEARS OF WRITING. I HAVE CHRONIC FATIGUE AND MY WIFE IS MY CARER. ON THE DAYS WHEN I'M NOT UP TO WRITING I LEAVE IT WITH GOD. YOU ARE AN INSPIRATION TO ME. GOD BLESS. GEOFF WRIGHT. AUSTRALIA
ReplyDeleteWow, Geoff, Congrats on your contract! It sounds like we share a number of the same hurdles to writing. I live with debilitating arthritis, constant pain, and raised a daughter with a severe emotional disorder. Praise God for your encouragement that it can be done.
DeleteI like this focus: God wants me to write today! I can handle that. Thanks for the uplifting post.
ReplyDeleteElaine, I have learned that God is a today kind of God. I don't need to know about 10 years in the future (or 10 months) - I just want to. :) God tells me what I need to know when it's time.
DeleteThank you for such an uplifting, encouraging post Darlene.
ReplyDeleteSmiles & Blessings,
Cindy Woolard
Cindy, I apologize for not responding earlier. Thanks for reading my post and your encouragement.
DeleteThere are many people who could be artists, painters, welders, and great bus drivers. That doesn't mean they should do those things; they just have the ability to perform a particular activity, be it a craft, a hobby or a life-long vocation.
ReplyDeleteI found this post curious. Is it a complaint? A whine? An inspirational call to keep writing? I found parts of it hard to believe.
I’ll go with “inspirational” as the intent but I must say, after reading many Novel Rocket posts, this struck me as strange, compared to others.
PS: I follow and read Novel Rocket “religiously” and constantly.
Hi Greg, I feel badly that you found my post puzzling. I will confess, I haven't read a great deal of Novel Rocket, so it may not fit its profile.
DeleteI am the most curious as to what parts felt unbelievable. I would appreciate your response to that. belovedfranklin (at) hotmail (dot) com
Greg, so many people have talents that go to waste simply because others tell them they 'shouldn't do it.' Why do these people do it--mainly because they don't possess that talent and find it easier to knock down those who do.
DeleteAs someone who deals with a disability daily, I found Darlene's article inspirational, simply because I've walked in her shoes. I've written two published novels flat on my back and sometimes wonder if God indeed has called me to write. In other words, the spirit is willing but the poor old body is weak. Thank God for those who continue to write despite those physical impairments--we have a voice to offer.
Thank you for the encouragement, Patty.
DeleteGreat encouragement. Thank you, Darlene.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Susan.
DeleteThank you so much for sharing this. It really hit home with me today! God bless!
ReplyDeleteSherri, so thankful this hit you where you needed this week.
DeleteNowadays writers are very important for every one specially for webmasters who are doing seo. Because content is everything at the internet. More content mean more visibility in search and come more traffic and visitors. So content is much much important. And content writers has more value then before. You are luck that you are content writer.
ReplyDeleteI never thought of myself as a "content" writer. Thanks for giving a new avenue to think about!
DeleteThank you for sharing your journey, Darlene, about the discovery of your call to write. People have many talents, but God's continued blessing on your ability to do what He has asked of you each day (I love that!) and the way others have been blessed by your books and your blogs are surely a ministry. The affirmation you have received when seeking God's will encourages us to do the same. I think instead of naming it self-doubt (when that happens to me) I will call it a check-point when I seek the Lord's affirming guidance. Surely you can write, though you do so with the blessing of God.
ReplyDeleteAs always, you inspire me!
Thank you for building me up, Carla.
DeleteDear Darlene:
ReplyDeleteThis was such a great start to my day--one of my absolute favorite Novel Rocket entries. Thanks for all the inspiring Bible verses.
Thanks for the Bible verses. And your entry is one of my absolute favorite Novel Rockets. Write on!
ReplyDelete