Colossians 1:10-12 And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that you may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light.
Every Thursday between the hours of five and six o’clock, I can be found sitting in the girls’ dressing room at my daughter Cassidy’s ballet school. It’s where the moms wait for their little ballerinas to finish their classes. I sit on an old couch that’s splotched with stains from fast food and spilled sodas despite the sign tacked to the wall above it, which reads, “Absolutely NO food or drinks on the sofa!” I sit with a book in my hand (the book I bring every week knowing full well I never end up reading) and chat with fellow ballet moms while girls from other classes come and go in a flurry of pink. We watch the girls giggle with one another as they tuck hair pins into their buns, pull on leg warmers and engage in Gumby-like stretching poses—impossible-looking contortions that would land most of us in a chiropractor's office.Recently, I was sitting on that couch when a group of young teen dancers glided in. They were halfway through a class, and like Mr. Rogers at the beginning of his show, it was time to change shoes, discarding their soft slippers for the satiny hard-toed toe shoes so they could dance "en pointe". It was interesting to watch. The girls had special inserts to place in the shoes’ tips, and as they prepared to put on the shoes, I noticed them passing around Band-aids and applying them to various parts of their feet. I asked the girl nearest me, “Are those to keep you from getting blisters?”
“Oh no,” she replied. “Last week when I was dancing my big toe nail split right up the middle. The Band-aid will hold it together.”
I cringed as another girl remarked matter-of-factly, “Yeah, the nail will fall off in a while. It always feels better after they fall off.” Several other girls nodded in agreement.
One by one the graceful dancers started trading ballerina-feet tales of horror—sprained toes, disfigured and lost nails, fungus…
The whole thing (aside from turning my stomach) really made me think about what isn’t commonly seen in art, that is the stuff behind the scenes. The ballet school we attend is a pretty serious one, and most of those teens on point have been dancing twice a week from a very young age. When I see them dancing on stage or in class, I am amazed by their grace. Their leaps and twirls, their arms swaying like willow branches in the breeze. It’s so lovely, and they make it look effortless.
But the battered feet I saw that day and the stories I heard from the girls bore witness to the work behind the end product. Years of practice, discipline, even pain are what enable the girls to perform so well.
Recently, I was doubting—for about the millionth time—whether I’m really cut out for novel-writing. A friend who is a far more experienced writer was listening to me whine. I made the statement, “It just seems to come so much more naturally for some people…”
Immediately my friend rebuked me. “Janet, it doesn’t come naturally for anyone! It’s hard work, even for the great ones.”
She was right, of course. It’s easy to watch a graceful dance, hear a flowing song, read brilliant prose, and mistakenly think the dancer, musician, or author has something we don’t—a gift that allows them to simply produce great things without major effort. Not so! Those artists studied, practiced, wrote bad manuscripts, wobbled on their toes, and hit squeaky notes all along the way.
In the same way, I sometimes envy truly mature Christians-- those annoyingly joy-filled people with unwavering faith and conistant walks. I wonder why it's so easy for them and so hard for me. Then I take a closer look at the paths these people travelled to get to that place of maturity. Those paths are riddled with hardship and loss; times of wandering off the straight-and-narrow and getting lost in dark woods; hard lessons learned; years of Bible-reading and prayer...cross-carrying. Even Jesus wasnt exempt from these things; He suffered loss, persecution, temptation...and endured.
My Cassidy will soon be a gingersnap in the dance school’s production of The Nutcracker. They do it every year and it’s always a wonderful production. They even hire professional ballerinas from New York City companies for the final act. These professionals take my breath away, but this year, as I watch them, I will remember the girls in the dressing room with brutalized feet. And when I’m struggling with my writing or my Christian walk, and my confidence breaks like a split toenail, I’ll slap on a prayerful Band-aid, and persevere.Lord, You tell us in your word that is it good to strive for excellence, to persevere in hard times, to have patience. Great art isn't any easier than learning to live a godly life. As I seek to grow, both in my craft and in my walk, help me not to give up, and not to be discouraged by the false notion that some people have it so much easier. We all have struggles, and we will all be rewarded for hard work. Thank you for everything you teach us on the way. Amen.
Hi Janet,
ReplyDeleteI've never read any of your fiction, so I can't say whether you're cut out to write a novel. But you are definitely cut out to write. This is a terrific devotional. A wonderful reminder for me that today - and everyday - God has given me what I need. If you publish a book of devotions, I'll be the first in line at Borders when it comes out!
Blessings,
Michele
Awww...thanks Michele! You're sweet to read and leave such a nice comment. (Michele is one of those ballet-moms I mentioned:)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the reminder that nothing is easy in this life, Janet. I look forward to your devotionals every week. I entrust you to the Father's care for your writing gift, my dear:). He has already blessed those who read your work so far.
ReplyDeletePeace...
Lynne
This is one of the best devotionals I've read, Janet. Bar none. It's a good reminder, not only for our writing, but for our spiritual life. Well done, my friend. And thank you.
ReplyDeleteI agree with all the above.
ReplyDeleteGreat post, Janet.
This is EXACTLY what I needed to read today. I've been struggling with self-doubt, loss of confidence, the absolute conviction that everything I've written to date is utter garbage. What a great reminder that it doesn't come easily for any of us. I'm going to print this out and keep it near me as I write.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for the encouragement. It was like a beautiful big Band-Aid on the split toenail of my self-esteem. :)
Thank you so much for posting this very honest and real devotional. I'm at a place where I've been feeling a little discouraged and (I'll admit) a little self-pitying. I loved what you said about the work going on behind the scenes-this was such a helpful thing for me to read today, thanks again!
ReplyDeleteWhat encouragement here! After some derogatory comments on my blog last week, I struggled with wondering whether I really was a writer and feeling a complete lack of creativity (despite a desire to write the next brilliant piece of work to prove them all wrong). It's so easy to think that those we admire have some great thing we lack... but they just worked harder and longer. So I'll get back to work here! :)
ReplyDeleteThank you all. I had a sneaking suspicion I wasn't the only one struggling with discouragement! Bless you and your writing, fellow scribes...
ReplyDelete