Just Say Thank You
Janet Rubin
Sitting in my usual pew—right-hand side of the sanctuary, two rows back—I watched with interest as Christine climbed the steps of the stage. According to the bulletin, she would sing a solo. I’d never known she could sing.
Christine’s hand trembled as she reached for the microphone. She closed her eyes for a moment, then swallowed and licked her lips before raising her eyes to the sound booth and giving a nod. After a pause, the accompanying music swelled from the speakers mounted on the sanctuary’s old columns and she began to sing.
Soft and shaky the first few measures, but as she closed her eyes and lifted a hand towards the ceiling, Christine’s voice increased in volume and rang out in a lovely, smooth alto.
I closed my eyes and let the song wash over me. Chill bumps prickled up and down my arms as I listened to the lyrics. I’d been troubled and praying about a particular issue and the words of Christine’s song were exactly what I needed to hear. God was doing what He so often does—ministering to me through the gifts of another believer. Tears streamed down my face as I breathed a prayer of thanks and a pew-neighbor passed me a tissue.
After the service, I swam against the tide of exiting church-goers to get to the front of the sanctuary and tell Christine how much I appreciated her solo.
Still sitting in her pew, Christine zipped up her Bible cover and I sat next to her. “I wanted to tell you how much your song blessed me. It was lovely.”
Christine shook her head. “Oh, I did terrible. I was so nervous.”
“No, Christine, you did a really good job and God ministered to me through the song. He really did.”
Christine’s cheeks reddened. “Well thanks,” she said in a voice that indicated she didn’t believe me at all.
I could relate. How often had someone complimented my writing and rather than accepting his or her sincere praise graciously, I had rejected it as flattery?
Why is it so hard for us to take compliments? Why do we find it so hard to believe that God can work through us, using the gifts He gave us to bless others?
As a writer, I have had a very hard time taking compliments—partly because I don’t feel worthy and partly because accepting praise seems sinful. Much of the time I simply don’t believe that the compliment is sincere. I’ll think, “He (or she) is just being nice.” Other times, I think the compliment is sincere, but the moment I think, “Yeah that story was pretty good,” I feel guilty of pride.
Can we accept compliments without being proud? Remembering three things will help us accept compliments in a way that honors God.
First, admitting that you have a gift is okay. God gives people gifts. Romans 12:6 says, “We have different gifts, according to the grace given us.
Second, the Bible says we should be humble, but that doesn’t mean thinking badly of ourselves. God wants us to be honest about who we are. Interestingly, He also addresses this issue in Romans 12, knowing we’d struggle with having gifts and having a proper opinion of ourselves .
Janet Rubin
Sitting in my usual pew—right-hand side of the sanctuary, two rows back—I watched with interest as Christine climbed the steps of the stage. According to the bulletin, she would sing a solo. I’d never known she could sing.
Christine’s hand trembled as she reached for the microphone. She closed her eyes for a moment, then swallowed and licked her lips before raising her eyes to the sound booth and giving a nod. After a pause, the accompanying music swelled from the speakers mounted on the sanctuary’s old columns and she began to sing.
Soft and shaky the first few measures, but as she closed her eyes and lifted a hand towards the ceiling, Christine’s voice increased in volume and rang out in a lovely, smooth alto.
I closed my eyes and let the song wash over me. Chill bumps prickled up and down my arms as I listened to the lyrics. I’d been troubled and praying about a particular issue and the words of Christine’s song were exactly what I needed to hear. God was doing what He so often does—ministering to me through the gifts of another believer. Tears streamed down my face as I breathed a prayer of thanks and a pew-neighbor passed me a tissue.
After the service, I swam against the tide of exiting church-goers to get to the front of the sanctuary and tell Christine how much I appreciated her solo.
Still sitting in her pew, Christine zipped up her Bible cover and I sat next to her. “I wanted to tell you how much your song blessed me. It was lovely.”
Christine shook her head. “Oh, I did terrible. I was so nervous.”
“No, Christine, you did a really good job and God ministered to me through the song. He really did.”
Christine’s cheeks reddened. “Well thanks,” she said in a voice that indicated she didn’t believe me at all.
I could relate. How often had someone complimented my writing and rather than accepting his or her sincere praise graciously, I had rejected it as flattery?
Why is it so hard for us to take compliments? Why do we find it so hard to believe that God can work through us, using the gifts He gave us to bless others?
As a writer, I have had a very hard time taking compliments—partly because I don’t feel worthy and partly because accepting praise seems sinful. Much of the time I simply don’t believe that the compliment is sincere. I’ll think, “He (or she) is just being nice.” Other times, I think the compliment is sincere, but the moment I think, “Yeah that story was pretty good,” I feel guilty of pride.
Can we accept compliments without being proud? Remembering three things will help us accept compliments in a way that honors God.
First, admitting that you have a gift is okay. God gives people gifts. Romans 12:6 says, “We have different gifts, according to the grace given us.
Second, the Bible says we should be humble, but that doesn’t mean thinking badly of ourselves. God wants us to be honest about who we are. Interestingly, He also addresses this issue in Romans 12, knowing we’d struggle with having gifts and having a proper opinion of ourselves .
Verse three Says, “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the measure of faith God has given you.” Paul says, “By the grace of God I am what I am.” (1 Corinthians 15:10)
By the grace of God, I’m a writer. Maybe even a pretty good writer, learning and growing every day.
Third, regardless of your level of talent, God can use your work. Do you really think God needs you to attain writing perfection before He can use your writing to touch people’s lives? He is God! He used a stuttering Moses to lead the Israelites and a little shepherd boy to bring down Goliath. If someone says, “Your story really blessed me,” rather than being skeptical, praise God!
The next time someone compliments your work,
Third, regardless of your level of talent, God can use your work. Do you really think God needs you to attain writing perfection before He can use your writing to touch people’s lives? He is God! He used a stuttering Moses to lead the Israelites and a little shepherd boy to bring down Goliath. If someone says, “Your story really blessed me,” rather than being skeptical, praise God!
The next time someone compliments your work,
take a deep breath and say, “Thank you.”
God, Thank you for giving me the gift of writing. You are my source of inspiration, ideas and talent. Please help me to have a proper estimation of myself and keep me from pride. I acknowledge that You have the power to use my work to bless those who read it and I pray that You would do so.
Amen
God, Thank you for giving me the gift of writing. You are my source of inspiration, ideas and talent. Please help me to have a proper estimation of myself and keep me from pride. I acknowledge that You have the power to use my work to bless those who read it and I pray that You would do so.
Amen
Thanks for that, Janet! I'm one of the biggest offenders of not being able to take a compliment. I'm going to work on that though. That blessed me.
ReplyDeleteJanet, lovely words and a great reminder. We writers walk a fine line between pride and self-abasement. Neither are good. It all boils down to gratitude. I'm closer to the line when I'm praising God for all He's done. Then if someone compliments me, I can say thank you and mean it, and shoot a praise heavenward. And if someone flatters me, I can ask God to remove that thorn of pride that inevitably pokes me.
ReplyDeleteThank you guys. And thank you Gina for this opportunity to be a part of Novel Journey!
ReplyDeleteI usually feel a little foolish when I compliment someone and they dismiss it.
ReplyDeleteIt's kind of like a blessing I experience is offered back as a blessing to them, but instead it richots and slaps me upside the head.
What a beautiful sentiment. That was a refreshing story. Thank you Janet!
ReplyDeleteI'm always surprised when complimented on my writing. Sometimes I feel like Reverend Collins of Pride and Prejudice with his little prewritten complimets for the ladies, but I had to script a reply that keeps me from falling into the unpleasant, oh-no-I'm-really-pretty-terrible-but-please-tell-me-more cycle that can come with compliments.
ReplyDelete"Thank you, that's very kind of you. I'm glad you enjoyed it." Simple and to the point. Then hopefully we move on to talk of the weather, and condition of the roads.
Words that minister, Janet. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteThe heart of the artist, whether a music, word, or paint artist is a tender place. Add Christianity to it and it becomes a ripe place for the devil to accuse us. It's good to be reminded the gift from God is a good thing, and we can accept the praise we get and offer it back to Him, the gift-giver as a sacrifice, sweet smelling and lovely.
Beautifully put, Ane. I love Susan's advice to have a "prepared statement." Gonna use that idea! Kelly, I know what you mean, and we don't even think of how we make someone feel when we dismiss their compliments. It's as if we're criticizing their judgement!
ReplyDelete